Cinnamon and spice and everything nice. And pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks. OM NOM NOM.
Yeah, well, in case you missed the last 7 memos, I live in the desert and fall doesn't exist here. Or at least, it doesn't exist when I think it should....(September until the end of November). Apparently it gets chilly for about 2 weeks in January and everyone in Phoenix freaks out and wears snowsuits because it dips below 50 degrees. Well I decided that I'm not going to wait for those two weeks, and last Wednesday I pulled out my scarves. Not kidding.
To clarify, I didn't wear them outside because that's dangerous. I nearly die of dehydration and heat exhaustion when I'm tooling around in shorts and a tank top.....a scarf would be the end of me. HOWEVER, the basement of the music building, where I have one of my singing classes, is colder than most freezers I know. Its jarring to walk through 100+ degree heat and then go down to the basement where it feels like late October. Not to mention that there is not a costume change for this transition. Still in the shorts and the tank. So I whipped out my scarves last week and while I wasn't exactly fashionable in my bi-polar (clever, right?....no? okay.) wardrobe, I certainly wasn't cold.
So I've decided to make a how-to entry for fall. For me, here are the things that quantify/qualify the occurrence of fall: fall clothing, fall food/cooking, fall home decor, fall weather and fall activities. I'm pretty sure I can imitate most of these requirements with semi-good success. IDK. You be the judge.
First, fall clothing. Well, in my haste to pack as quickly as possible and with my intention to not fill the car with unnecessary things, I failed to bring ANY sweaters with me to Arizona. I check my closet almost every day to see if any of them have magically appeared (I love Harry Potter) but alas, I apparently need to do some more work on my summoning charms. Drat. However, I have....how do you say....umm.....a gaggle of wool socks? (I discussed the usage of this term with a certain Fullerton this morning) No, a stash. Yes, a stash of wool socks at my disposal and one of my favorite activities is to wander around my apartment in my shorts and wool socks, regardless of the outside temperature. Its fun. Try it. Plus, its easier to slide around the tile floors with wool socks, than it is with regular socks....which is what I do when I'm supposed to be practicing. Apparently not much has changed since my undergrad. Whoops.
Next, fall food and cooking. Well I love fall food, but I'm not much of a cook as of yet, so I'll need to work on that. Recently, there was an allegedly delicious recipe for fall-type muffins that was passed around on le Facebook by some of my fall-loving college friends. I was about to attempt the baking of said muffins until I considered the repercussions of my failing to make them correctly. To start off, I don't yet own muffing baking equipment, ie. the muffin pan or muffin cups. And I've never made muffins. Eh, that's not true. One time, the boy person let me stir the ingredients for some muffins in the dish, but he did all the hard work and I wasn't paying that close of attention, so I don't remember the details. Plus, I'm pretty sure if I ruined the muffins, it would be a pretty huge setback for my cooking confidence. So far, I've only ruined dinner twice and breakfast 4 times. And two of the breakfast-fails were because I was too tired to function and probably shouldn't have been let near an oven anyway. All's well that ends well. Or something like that. For now, I will stick to eating Target-bought granola and drinking the Pumpkin Spice Lattes from Starbucks. Have you had one? They're life changing. You'll probably cry and have a midlife crisis, or something to that effect, so be prepared.
The toughie: Fall Home Decor. I'm not really sure what qualifies as fall home decor. Don't get me wrong, I have a huge appreciation for the moments when I walk into a house and have the sensation that it is properly equipped for the enjoyment of fall, I just can't put my finger on exactly what qualifies as a specifically fall-oriented decoration. So far, I've made three fall adjustments to my living space. I got a fall-colored afghan. Its brown and orange and leaf-colored and its wonderful to snuggle in and it smells like fresh linens because I dipped it in Febreze. The smell was overwhelming at first, but now its perfect. My second purchase was not entirely thought-through when I carried it out and you can tell in the presentation. I bought some fake leaves from my favorites store. I feel shameful even when I write that. Having come from a home where fake plants are valued over real plants because of their low-maitenence qualities, I felt like I was making a good choice. But when the fake plants that you buy are cloth leaves in a bag, and when you scatter your fake leaves around your already too-small kitchen table, and then you're nervous to eat there because you might ruin the arrangement that you spent 20 minutes on, you might find yourself on the list of nominees for "People Least Qualified to Decorate a Home, 2011." My final item, however is a winner. Candles. Cinnamon and Pumpkin scented candles. They give off a nice glow and they make any space smell like you rubbed potpourri on your face. I love it.....until I get nervous that I left my candles burning while I'm at school. Luckily, I never forget to blow my candles out...unfortunately, I just never remember actually doing it. Let me tell you, the flop-sweats are a thing even if you don't have bangs, and especially if you are worried that you're burning down your house while you're supposed to be learning fake-acoustics. #distracting
Fall weather. This is another toughie, especially if you already know you suck at summoning charms. Clearly the weather-changing spells are out of your league. So I make do. My favorite thing to do in this category, is to turn my air conditioning on the highest fan setting and the lowest temperature setting and then ram around my apartment in sweatpants and a blanket. I used to do this when I was in 6th grade, but my parents got mad at me for jacking up the energy bills. Well now that I live with myself, I can make my own decisions and if my need to feel cold overrides my need to eat for a week or two, so be it. Sacrifices people, sacrifices. Plus, I've always had a weird fascination about what it would actually be like to live as a starving artist. Well after this next energy bill, I just might find out.....anyway. Who doesn't love waking up in the morning to a cold room, but having it be toasty warm under the covers? Where do I sign up?
Finally, fall activities. I played football last week and it wasn't by accident. I found some boys from a frat and they asked if I would play. It was early and I was hungry, so in my dazed confusion, I said yes. It was tackle football. I think my hip is broken. Small price to pay....well I guess I won't be doing A Chorus Line anytime soon. It was fun though. I'm trying to think of fall activities and I'm coming up with nothing. My humble opinion is that any activity that is performed in the fall is automatically better because of it being fall. Right? Going on walks? Better in the fall because of the leaves. Cooking? Better in the fall because there are fall-inspired ingredients and recipes. Going out on the town? Better in the fall because of the plethora of fall clothing options.
Well, I guess I've sacrificed fall for the next two years in order to get this silly piece of paper from ASU. But then its straight back to the Twin Cities to enjoy autumn.....and the other seasons as well, for in the other seasons, I anticipate autumn. Until then, I will ponder about baking fall muffins and I will try not to burn down my house. Wish me luck.
A
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