This will be short because it is currently 1:26 am and it has become increasingly clear to me that while I have no business being up and about anytime before the crack of 10am, it is apparently socially unacceptable for me to lay in bed until noon. Thoughts?
For a quick update: Zombie Prom is still going superbly. While we are not quite as far ahead of schedule as we were about two weeks ago, we still have about 4 weeks before the show goes up and it is in great shape. I just started rehearsing the pit last week and while it will take some work to get the transitions clean and consistent, the kids we have playing for the show are each really fantastic in their own way and I am really excited to work with them and get to know them like I have gotten to know the rest of the cast.
The most exciting piece of news that I have is that I just started rehearsing for my latest show, a musical called "Deal Dammit". It is a brand new piece that will culminate in a semi-staged reading in October. There was a reading of this show about 6 months ago and since then, the script and the score have been reworked and rewritten. The aspect that I find most fascinating about this process is the fact that I am able to witness the actual creation of art. The playwright and the composer will be working with the cast and the production team and tailoring the show as we go. So far, we have had about 8 hours of rehearsal and have gotten through the whole show once and worked out a few kinks in some of the larger ensemble numbers. The cast consists of about 10 local performers and while I haven't worked with any of them in the past, they all seem to be really talented performers and they have been great to work with so far! It is just another reminder of how thankful I am to be living in a city where the arts are so vibrant and present!
And once again, plans have been tinkered with for next fall. While the original plan (as of about 8 months ago) was to attend NYU for the MT program, I have recently been in conversation with Arizona State University. They have a fantastic program as well and who doesn't like the weather down there? In all seriousness, I am not 100% sure that I am ready to backtrack to New York. I am very aware of what they have to offer me (as well as what I have to offer them) and I am more than content to find work in smaller markets. For now. In reality, who knows? My friends know that I change my mind about every two weeks. You can set your watch by it, if you like.
Speaking of friends, I finally feel like I have balanced my social life with....well, everything else. It has been a difficult task since college to find time to get work stuff done and to keep in touch with everyone. Fortunately, I have Facebook. And blogging. And Skype. And Twitter. And email. And texting. And calling. And smoke signals. For all intensive purposes, I am a technology/communication whore. And I am fine with that. I guess you do what you have to do in order to make your life fit the priorities that you have. After a few really insightful conversations, I have reconciled the fact that it is okay to have goals for personal success. And it is also completely acceptable to pursue those goals whole-heartedly. This is what I plan on doing in addition to staying grounded with the help of the people that have been there for me from the beginning. This is what keeps me sane. This is what keeps me whole.
Yours,
Andrew
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Monday, September 20, 2010
AUDITIONS ARE DUMB.
I hate auditioning. I could legitimately end this post right now and you would have a pretty clear idea of what I am about to expound upon.
I have heard all of the arguments about this. The fact that there is not currently a more effective way for casting directors to see and evaluate talent. The concept that an audition is a performance and that is how the actor should approach it, thus removing the extraneous nerves that come with it. The fact that there will always be more auditions. The idea that the auditors are not looking for the person with the most talent, they are looking for who is "right". I could go on and on.
The worst part is that I am 100% guilty of spewing these vicious lies to my students. I coach dozens of singers every month for auditions, performances, juries, etc, and yet I still cannot get past the reality that, when you submit yourself to an audition, you are ultimately going there to be judged on your worth. Its the equivalent of going on a date and having the date give you the once over before telling you to that you can go and "dont call me, I will call you." WHY DO I DO THIS?
You might ask yourself why this sudden animosity towards the hiring process. I had two auditions today. One was on Skype and it was one of the most degrading experiences of my life. I sang my first song, and then they asked for another. Both went fine. Then the people on the audition panel proceeded to move off camera to discuss what they had just heard. Now I am not sure if this was their first time using Skype as a medium for auditions, but just because I cannot see you does not mean that I cannot HEAR you. Yes, that is right. I could hear every single word that was spoken. While most of the commentary was refreshingly positive, the fact that I was being discussed like a piece of meat was one of the most horrifying realizations of my short (and getting shorter by the minute) career. I am the product. Me. I think I took this especially hard because I am a singer. Its not like a trumpet player or pianist in that you can put your instrument down and walk away from it. My voice is an integral part of who I am and training it is an immensely personal journey that can be both joyous and traumatizing.
I was pampered in school in the fact that every audition I did was for people that had known me for months if not years. They knew my passion. They knew my work ethic. They knew my product. At school, there was a hierarchy and a check and balance system. People who did not get certain roles could usually expect to get some other form of compensation later on. In the post-school world, there is no balance. If you are the best, you get the gig. At the second audition, I knew almost everyone there. All of them are top notch performers and can be seen on regional stages regularly. While I am honored and humbled to audition alongside these individuals, it is also a daunting task to walk into the room and sing after someone who you basically idolize has just walked out.
A singing actor hones his craft by studying privately, by taking classes, by watching others, through trust, through honesty, with determination and with humility. I would venture to say that I love what I do. Some days (like today) I question that. Today, I asked myself time and time again whether musical theater was something that I truly loved or if it is just something that I am good at. Or maybe it is both. I pour everything I have into my work. I come home exhausted every day from rehearsal because I left my heart and soul on the stage and in the rehearsal studio. And when I go to auditions, I leave it all out there. And the very concept that someone can look at you and deny you the opportunity to do what you love is, to me, heartbreaking.
It sounds very cliche, but to me, this form of expression is like breathing. It is not a coincidence that the word inspiration has two different but very connected definitions. In anatomical terms, inspiration is the taking in of air into the lungs. A process that needs to occur to keep the body alive. The other is the arousal of the mind to creativity. It is the combination of these two concepts that define how I work. They are two different things and yet one and the same. When I sing, I am alive. That is the only way I know how to explain it. When I help others find this quality in their own lives, it is the most rewarding experience I have had the privilege of knowing. I have seen singing bring unity, peace, comfort, and understanding. Why would I ever want to stop doing that?
Throughout the course of writing this entry, I have had an epiphany of sorts. I need to keep the bigger picture in mind. I am blessed to be surrounded by people who not only understand my unquenchable passion for expression, but share it as well. They graciously remind me that it is not what I do that counts, but who I am. It is so easy to get these two things blurry and blended, and all too often we find ourselves defined by what we do. Yes, I sing. But there is so much more to me than that.
Thus, the sun will come out tomorrow.
I cannot believe I just quoted that show.
Until next time.
Tenderly,
A
I have heard all of the arguments about this. The fact that there is not currently a more effective way for casting directors to see and evaluate talent. The concept that an audition is a performance and that is how the actor should approach it, thus removing the extraneous nerves that come with it. The fact that there will always be more auditions. The idea that the auditors are not looking for the person with the most talent, they are looking for who is "right". I could go on and on.
The worst part is that I am 100% guilty of spewing these vicious lies to my students. I coach dozens of singers every month for auditions, performances, juries, etc, and yet I still cannot get past the reality that, when you submit yourself to an audition, you are ultimately going there to be judged on your worth. Its the equivalent of going on a date and having the date give you the once over before telling you to that you can go and "dont call me, I will call you." WHY DO I DO THIS?
You might ask yourself why this sudden animosity towards the hiring process. I had two auditions today. One was on Skype and it was one of the most degrading experiences of my life. I sang my first song, and then they asked for another. Both went fine. Then the people on the audition panel proceeded to move off camera to discuss what they had just heard. Now I am not sure if this was their first time using Skype as a medium for auditions, but just because I cannot see you does not mean that I cannot HEAR you. Yes, that is right. I could hear every single word that was spoken. While most of the commentary was refreshingly positive, the fact that I was being discussed like a piece of meat was one of the most horrifying realizations of my short (and getting shorter by the minute) career. I am the product. Me. I think I took this especially hard because I am a singer. Its not like a trumpet player or pianist in that you can put your instrument down and walk away from it. My voice is an integral part of who I am and training it is an immensely personal journey that can be both joyous and traumatizing.
I was pampered in school in the fact that every audition I did was for people that had known me for months if not years. They knew my passion. They knew my work ethic. They knew my product. At school, there was a hierarchy and a check and balance system. People who did not get certain roles could usually expect to get some other form of compensation later on. In the post-school world, there is no balance. If you are the best, you get the gig. At the second audition, I knew almost everyone there. All of them are top notch performers and can be seen on regional stages regularly. While I am honored and humbled to audition alongside these individuals, it is also a daunting task to walk into the room and sing after someone who you basically idolize has just walked out.
A singing actor hones his craft by studying privately, by taking classes, by watching others, through trust, through honesty, with determination and with humility. I would venture to say that I love what I do. Some days (like today) I question that. Today, I asked myself time and time again whether musical theater was something that I truly loved or if it is just something that I am good at. Or maybe it is both. I pour everything I have into my work. I come home exhausted every day from rehearsal because I left my heart and soul on the stage and in the rehearsal studio. And when I go to auditions, I leave it all out there. And the very concept that someone can look at you and deny you the opportunity to do what you love is, to me, heartbreaking.
It sounds very cliche, but to me, this form of expression is like breathing. It is not a coincidence that the word inspiration has two different but very connected definitions. In anatomical terms, inspiration is the taking in of air into the lungs. A process that needs to occur to keep the body alive. The other is the arousal of the mind to creativity. It is the combination of these two concepts that define how I work. They are two different things and yet one and the same. When I sing, I am alive. That is the only way I know how to explain it. When I help others find this quality in their own lives, it is the most rewarding experience I have had the privilege of knowing. I have seen singing bring unity, peace, comfort, and understanding. Why would I ever want to stop doing that?
Throughout the course of writing this entry, I have had an epiphany of sorts. I need to keep the bigger picture in mind. I am blessed to be surrounded by people who not only understand my unquenchable passion for expression, but share it as well. They graciously remind me that it is not what I do that counts, but who I am. It is so easy to get these two things blurry and blended, and all too often we find ourselves defined by what we do. Yes, I sing. But there is so much more to me than that.
Thus, the sun will come out tomorrow.
I cannot believe I just quoted that show.
Until next time.
Tenderly,
A
Friday, September 17, 2010
Split Personalities....to true? Don't respond. That's rhetorical.
Well, last week I figured out that I'm old. This week I realized that I am super cool. Like ridiculously cool. Unbelievably, unequivocally cool. So cool, in fact, that I am sitting by myself on a Friday night doing character research for my next two shows. I'm sitting here wearing my favorite yellow shorts and my inherited Iowa State tshirt, on my too-big-for-my-room, overstuffed gray futon, with my laptop, dozens of acting books and journals, a couple scripts and a giant pitcher of iced tea. I told you I was cool.
I've been trying to take this whole acting thing seriously, or as seriously as I can, because after all it is, umm....well, my job. Hell has frozen over. There were many, MANY roles in the past that I treated as vehicles for people to hear me sing. Tacky, I know. That, paired with the fact that most of my roles as of yet have been fairly iconic, well known characterizations that don't need a whole lot of shaping from the actor beyond what is in the score and the script. For example, in Joseph, I was pretty much just along for the ride and only had a few moments when I had to make a strong choice of my own. Along the same vein, Link Larkin is not the most active character ever written in the modern MT repertoire. He is fairly (and purposefully) two-dimensional and vapid for most of the show, and even in the end, isn't really as dreamy as everyone thinks he is. And yet another was Jimmy Smith in Thoroughly Modern Millie. This was one of my dream roles, not because I really could relate to his life or his ideals, but because I wanted to sing the crap out of his big number in the first act. Tasteful, I know.
Luckily for me, the future of my career, and those kind enough to come see me in shows, I have begun to actually think about the guts of these people whose skin I'm borrowing for the evening. Along with having a more balanced taste for shows, I have also been given the opportunity to play some deeper, more realistic characters as of late. The one I'm hitting hard tonight is Lucas from Bare. The wonderful (and frustrating) part of this guy is that the script is very open ended concerning him. Essentially what I'm given is that he is the Catholic boarding school's fun loving party boy and is also the purveyor of altered reality (drug dealer). I don't think I've ever given more thought to a fictional person in my life....except when I was little.....I had an imaginary friend named Bobby, and he dominated my time. The process of creating Lucas has been totally fascinating so far. I am doing a ton of research on the drugs that he deals, the goings-on of Catholic boarding schools, teen psychology and I've also been doing a ton of people watching. All of this research (in theory) will help me make honest choices when I forget all of it on stage. That's the frustrating thing. All of this is only the groundwork. The real deal happens on the boards with the other players. Their choices shape mine and vice versa.
My other musical that goes up in THREE WEEKS is a little more ambiguous. My character's name is Johnny and beyond that, I know little. I've read through the script about 4 times and still can't get all the action to work in a way that makes sense in my head. We have a table read soon and hopefully that will shed some sort of light on this whole thing. Fingers are crossed. I have an audition in three days with a company that I've wanted to sing with for a very long time and they're doing a show that fits my type PERFECTLY. I'm trying to not getting my hopes up, but I'm not doing a very good job.
Zombie Prom is going super well, but I kinda don't know what to do with myself with how long the rehearsal period is. As far as I know, most high schools put up a musical in 5-8 weeks. We have FOURTEEN. Right now, we are still about 5 weeks out, but all the music is memorized and sounding fantastic. If I have any say in this, ZP is gonna be one of the best high school musicals in the Twin Cities this fall. The cast has been fantastic to work with. They are super willing to try anything I throw at them and they are like sponges when it comes to learning about theater and singing. The rest of the production team is fantastic as well. The choreographer is a dance major at the U of M and he has managed to find the perfect style for the show - campy, energetic it actually follows the storyline. Other choreographers - take notes. The director and tech director are both faculty at the school and they have been super supportive and just let me do my thing, which has been awesome. I start rehearsals with the pit orchestra tomorrow morning, so I should probably hit the sack, but I am bringing the instrumentalists doughnuts and juice, so hopefully they don't kill me for the early call time. They should know, however that if I had my way, I would be getting up at the crack of .....well,.....about 10:30. Oh well.
One last thing. I have had a surprising amount of people approach me and tell me that they have read my blog, and then give me a look like I might bite their head off. I just want you all to know that this is not some secret diary that you found under my bed and are reading under the covers by flashlight. I put this up because its a fun way to put my thoughts on paper...er screen and its an easy way for friends in other vicinities to keep up with what I'm doing/thinking/experiencing in life. So read freely! Meanwhile, I have to be out the door in about 7 hours, so I need to be asleep in T-15 minutes if I plan on being a friendly person tomorrow.
No beige!
A
I've been trying to take this whole acting thing seriously, or as seriously as I can, because after all it is, umm....well, my job. Hell has frozen over. There were many, MANY roles in the past that I treated as vehicles for people to hear me sing. Tacky, I know. That, paired with the fact that most of my roles as of yet have been fairly iconic, well known characterizations that don't need a whole lot of shaping from the actor beyond what is in the score and the script. For example, in Joseph, I was pretty much just along for the ride and only had a few moments when I had to make a strong choice of my own. Along the same vein, Link Larkin is not the most active character ever written in the modern MT repertoire. He is fairly (and purposefully) two-dimensional and vapid for most of the show, and even in the end, isn't really as dreamy as everyone thinks he is. And yet another was Jimmy Smith in Thoroughly Modern Millie. This was one of my dream roles, not because I really could relate to his life or his ideals, but because I wanted to sing the crap out of his big number in the first act. Tasteful, I know.
Luckily for me, the future of my career, and those kind enough to come see me in shows, I have begun to actually think about the guts of these people whose skin I'm borrowing for the evening. Along with having a more balanced taste for shows, I have also been given the opportunity to play some deeper, more realistic characters as of late. The one I'm hitting hard tonight is Lucas from Bare. The wonderful (and frustrating) part of this guy is that the script is very open ended concerning him. Essentially what I'm given is that he is the Catholic boarding school's fun loving party boy and is also the purveyor of altered reality (drug dealer). I don't think I've ever given more thought to a fictional person in my life....except when I was little.....I had an imaginary friend named Bobby, and he dominated my time. The process of creating Lucas has been totally fascinating so far. I am doing a ton of research on the drugs that he deals, the goings-on of Catholic boarding schools, teen psychology and I've also been doing a ton of people watching. All of this research (in theory) will help me make honest choices when I forget all of it on stage. That's the frustrating thing. All of this is only the groundwork. The real deal happens on the boards with the other players. Their choices shape mine and vice versa.
My other musical that goes up in THREE WEEKS is a little more ambiguous. My character's name is Johnny and beyond that, I know little. I've read through the script about 4 times and still can't get all the action to work in a way that makes sense in my head. We have a table read soon and hopefully that will shed some sort of light on this whole thing. Fingers are crossed. I have an audition in three days with a company that I've wanted to sing with for a very long time and they're doing a show that fits my type PERFECTLY. I'm trying to not getting my hopes up, but I'm not doing a very good job.
Zombie Prom is going super well, but I kinda don't know what to do with myself with how long the rehearsal period is. As far as I know, most high schools put up a musical in 5-8 weeks. We have FOURTEEN. Right now, we are still about 5 weeks out, but all the music is memorized and sounding fantastic. If I have any say in this, ZP is gonna be one of the best high school musicals in the Twin Cities this fall. The cast has been fantastic to work with. They are super willing to try anything I throw at them and they are like sponges when it comes to learning about theater and singing. The rest of the production team is fantastic as well. The choreographer is a dance major at the U of M and he has managed to find the perfect style for the show - campy, energetic it actually follows the storyline. Other choreographers - take notes. The director and tech director are both faculty at the school and they have been super supportive and just let me do my thing, which has been awesome. I start rehearsals with the pit orchestra tomorrow morning, so I should probably hit the sack, but I am bringing the instrumentalists doughnuts and juice, so hopefully they don't kill me for the early call time. They should know, however that if I had my way, I would be getting up at the crack of .....well,.....about 10:30. Oh well.
One last thing. I have had a surprising amount of people approach me and tell me that they have read my blog, and then give me a look like I might bite their head off. I just want you all to know that this is not some secret diary that you found under my bed and are reading under the covers by flashlight. I put this up because its a fun way to put my thoughts on paper...er screen and its an easy way for friends in other vicinities to keep up with what I'm doing/thinking/experiencing in life. So read freely! Meanwhile, I have to be out the door in about 7 hours, so I need to be asleep in T-15 minutes if I plan on being a friendly person tomorrow.
No beige!
A
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
All Grown Up. Ha. That's laughable.
Today, I discovered that I am an adult.
Absolutely devastating, right? I KNOW!!!!
I've been noticing clues popping up all over the place as of late. There's the obvious ones, like being completely OCD about working and the compensation that is included with such activities. I have been auditioning like a madman and doing SO much preparation for each one because a year ago, my auditions were a HOT MESS and I just relied on getting gigs through my networking skills. Also laughable, right?
Another clue is that I am scheduling things more than a few hours in advance. Back in college, when I directed Edges, my cast was about ready to kill me at times with my rehearsal schedule.....or lack thereof....The upside of this new obsession is that I am officially booked through the END OF THE YEAR! STABILITY! YESSSS! Another example is that I made (and carried out) a six week rehearsal plan for Zombie Prom. I know that pales in comparison to my friends who are music ed people, but for me, that is more or less unheard of. I usually make tons of tentative plans for things and then I lose interest (because I have the attention span of a goldfish) or I lose the plans themselves. Real professional, right?
The final straw was that tonight, after a rousing game of kickball with some friends, we went out to a bar near the University of Minnesota and I ordered a beer. AND I LIKED IT.
(gasps)
I always absolutely hated the taste of beer. Any beer. It didn't matter what kind or how "hoppy" it was. Whatever that means. The only beer I really liked EVER was a beer that my friend Joel gave to me when we were on a tour stop in Texas. And only after did I find out that it was actually half cider. So there's that.
Everyone always told me that my tastes would mature and I would develop an appreciation for beer and other "adult things" and apparently, today is that day. Horrifying. Soon I'll be getting dentures and a hip replacement and I'll be writing these entries from my favorite overstuffed rocking chair in the nursing home right off of Plymouth Boulevard. Can't wait.
As jarring as this realization was, I have taken this week off (yes, I have a week off! =] ) to review my life as it currently stands. And it actually looks okay. I just booked a reading of a new musical that will be going up the first week of October. I'm not sure if it is staged or semi-staged or a table-read or what. Now that I think of it, I don't even know the plot of the show. I should really be more attentive when reading audition notices....but anyway, I am really excited about this because its not often that an actor gets to work directly with the playwright and composer of a piece. Super pumped. I am also sending in my materials for final rounds for a replacement in a national tour. I can't say much on that yet though, because nothing is set in stone.
I have also had the recent pleasure of catching up with a lot of friends who I haven't seen since either graduation or since I last worked with them, which in some cases, has been years! I am so proud of each of them. Its so easy to become very self-involved in life. The type of work that I do is very centered on, well....me. Between acting workshops, voice coaching, dance classes and the type of critical feedback I receive, it is increasingly easy for everything else to fade away. I think this is why I find it so invigorating to hear about what other people are working on, whether its arts related or not. I am so enthralled by the daily goings-on in the lives of my friends! And I am so proud of the things that they are doing in their lives. Many of my friends are just getting their first taste of classroom shenanigans during their student teaching, which includes the obligatory hilarity that ensues when shaping young minds. Hahaha! One highlight is that I recently had the immense privilege of seeing two friends and former colleagues perform in the Nat'l tour of Wicked and one cool cat just got back to this side of the pond after finishing Hair in London. Crazy, right?!?! Everyone is growing up so fast. Myself included.....which is scary but also really exciting. That is the interesting thing about the future. The unknown is one of the most scary things to me, but if I keep all my ducks in a row and continue to surround myself with the passionate, caring people that frequent my life, things should turn out okay, right?!
Theme of the month: Don't fade to beige.
This has been one of the most influential ideas over the past few years, and after seeing it play a huge role in my life and the lives of those around me, I think its probably a keeper.
Be well.
Andy
Absolutely devastating, right? I KNOW!!!!
I've been noticing clues popping up all over the place as of late. There's the obvious ones, like being completely OCD about working and the compensation that is included with such activities. I have been auditioning like a madman and doing SO much preparation for each one because a year ago, my auditions were a HOT MESS and I just relied on getting gigs through my networking skills. Also laughable, right?
Another clue is that I am scheduling things more than a few hours in advance. Back in college, when I directed Edges, my cast was about ready to kill me at times with my rehearsal schedule.....or lack thereof....The upside of this new obsession is that I am officially booked through the END OF THE YEAR! STABILITY! YESSSS! Another example is that I made (and carried out) a six week rehearsal plan for Zombie Prom. I know that pales in comparison to my friends who are music ed people, but for me, that is more or less unheard of. I usually make tons of tentative plans for things and then I lose interest (because I have the attention span of a goldfish) or I lose the plans themselves. Real professional, right?
The final straw was that tonight, after a rousing game of kickball with some friends, we went out to a bar near the University of Minnesota and I ordered a beer. AND I LIKED IT.
(gasps)
I always absolutely hated the taste of beer. Any beer. It didn't matter what kind or how "hoppy" it was. Whatever that means. The only beer I really liked EVER was a beer that my friend Joel gave to me when we were on a tour stop in Texas. And only after did I find out that it was actually half cider. So there's that.
Everyone always told me that my tastes would mature and I would develop an appreciation for beer and other "adult things" and apparently, today is that day. Horrifying. Soon I'll be getting dentures and a hip replacement and I'll be writing these entries from my favorite overstuffed rocking chair in the nursing home right off of Plymouth Boulevard. Can't wait.
As jarring as this realization was, I have taken this week off (yes, I have a week off! =] ) to review my life as it currently stands. And it actually looks okay. I just booked a reading of a new musical that will be going up the first week of October. I'm not sure if it is staged or semi-staged or a table-read or what. Now that I think of it, I don't even know the plot of the show. I should really be more attentive when reading audition notices....but anyway, I am really excited about this because its not often that an actor gets to work directly with the playwright and composer of a piece. Super pumped. I am also sending in my materials for final rounds for a replacement in a national tour. I can't say much on that yet though, because nothing is set in stone.
I have also had the recent pleasure of catching up with a lot of friends who I haven't seen since either graduation or since I last worked with them, which in some cases, has been years! I am so proud of each of them. Its so easy to become very self-involved in life. The type of work that I do is very centered on, well....me. Between acting workshops, voice coaching, dance classes and the type of critical feedback I receive, it is increasingly easy for everything else to fade away. I think this is why I find it so invigorating to hear about what other people are working on, whether its arts related or not. I am so enthralled by the daily goings-on in the lives of my friends! And I am so proud of the things that they are doing in their lives. Many of my friends are just getting their first taste of classroom shenanigans during their student teaching, which includes the obligatory hilarity that ensues when shaping young minds. Hahaha! One highlight is that I recently had the immense privilege of seeing two friends and former colleagues perform in the Nat'l tour of Wicked and one cool cat just got back to this side of the pond after finishing Hair in London. Crazy, right?!?! Everyone is growing up so fast. Myself included.....which is scary but also really exciting. That is the interesting thing about the future. The unknown is one of the most scary things to me, but if I keep all my ducks in a row and continue to surround myself with the passionate, caring people that frequent my life, things should turn out okay, right?!
Theme of the month: Don't fade to beige.
This has been one of the most influential ideas over the past few years, and after seeing it play a huge role in my life and the lives of those around me, I think its probably a keeper.
Be well.
Andy
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Me gusta cantar!
Once again, I am an only child. Well, not really. I have a younger sister who just graduated from high school this past spring. She is five years younger than me, but we get along pretty well. This morning, she left on a plane and will be back sometime in December. Unlike the typical high school graduate, she is not traveling to some college campus to start her freshman year. She opted to be a part of a gap year program, where she will spend fall semester in the Dominican Republic and then spring semester in Spain. Two days before I was informed of this decision, I was told that she was deciding between two schools: Luther College and then University of Denver. Both were fine with me. Fast forward two days and my parents tell me that they are sending her on what most would consider a year-long VACATION. NOT FAIR.
After I got all the details, it was more clear that her time would be spent immersing herself in the culture, doing volunteer work and living a localized life with her host family. To me, this experience sounds absolutely horrific and by the end of the first week, I would most certainly be a hot mess in the line at Sun Country Airlines, buying the first ticket back to the states. My sister, on the other hand, lives for adventure and was totally pumped for her adventure to start. I think I may have just gotten an ulcer just thinking about all the things she will experience in the next few months. Its not that I am a homebody who only travels far enough to get home before dark - I have traveled all over the country with shows and with college groups and things....but I have discovered that the only place that I really care to travel to is New York. Call me narrow-minded, but that is how I feel.
Anyway, she is gone and I am taking her room. Just kidding. She would shoot me. But it will be a totally different dynamic here at home. She is like my built-in playmate and sometimes we stay up until the middle of the night just talking about nothing. I am really excited to hear about all the things she did when she gets back, but I will miss her until then. Boo hoo.
This next week is sizing up to be a tiring one. My fall term of voice lessons starts on Sunday and I have a bunch of new students that are going to rely on me to actually know what I am talking about. Good grief. So I spent the last four years getting a degree in opera performance, only to find out that I actually hate opera. Sure, I had to follow the requirements set forth by the vocal department, but I rebelled as much as I was able to, without getting kicked out. I was never quite sure why I was so turned off by opera. Perhaps it was the preconceived notion of vocal beauty and that it was not only required, but was not up for interpretation of any kind. Sure, opera folks will say that there is plenty of leeway in the art form, but I never found it. I only felt restricted and suffocated by what was supposed to be a beautiful form of expression.
This is why I turned to musical theater. I am so enamored with the concept that anything that is said or sung onstage is governed by dramatic elements. That gives the storyteller so much freedom to make choices that are based on clarity as opposed to right and wrong. So because of this relationship that I have with opera, right after graduation, I went buck wild and swore off classical singing altogether.....until tonight. Because my teaching philosophy is based on classical principles, I figured I needed to make sure I could actually still sing the stuff. And I was SHOCKED because it actually sounded better than it ever did during school! I have no idea how that happened, but I actually enjoyed going through my German pieces and my Faure and Bizet sets and then finally, my arias. I have always had a bit of a need to push my limits a bit, and that has DEFINITELY applied to my aria choices as well. The last one I sang tonight was Si puo, which is the prologue from the opera Pagliacci. If any of my voice teachers are reading this, they are probably going to load their shotguns. Dont worry. I AGREE. This piece is too big for me and I will probably never sing it outside of my house or a barricaded practice room. I vividly remember singing this aria at school really late one night, and after nailing, NAILING the last few pages, glancing out of the window of my practice room and seeing one of the faculty members giving me a look that made me feel like my eyelashes were going to be singed off. Welcome to my life. That was nothing compared to when they heard me belting. Oh well. In the end, if I can sing opera and also sing musical theater, that only makes me versatile, and that seems like more of an advantage than something that needs to be snuffed out. Just saying.
Maybe I wont wait another three months before I sing this stuff again. Eh. On second thought....ha!
Ciao!
After I got all the details, it was more clear that her time would be spent immersing herself in the culture, doing volunteer work and living a localized life with her host family. To me, this experience sounds absolutely horrific and by the end of the first week, I would most certainly be a hot mess in the line at Sun Country Airlines, buying the first ticket back to the states. My sister, on the other hand, lives for adventure and was totally pumped for her adventure to start. I think I may have just gotten an ulcer just thinking about all the things she will experience in the next few months. Its not that I am a homebody who only travels far enough to get home before dark - I have traveled all over the country with shows and with college groups and things....but I have discovered that the only place that I really care to travel to is New York. Call me narrow-minded, but that is how I feel.
Anyway, she is gone and I am taking her room. Just kidding. She would shoot me. But it will be a totally different dynamic here at home. She is like my built-in playmate and sometimes we stay up until the middle of the night just talking about nothing. I am really excited to hear about all the things she did when she gets back, but I will miss her until then. Boo hoo.
This next week is sizing up to be a tiring one. My fall term of voice lessons starts on Sunday and I have a bunch of new students that are going to rely on me to actually know what I am talking about. Good grief. So I spent the last four years getting a degree in opera performance, only to find out that I actually hate opera. Sure, I had to follow the requirements set forth by the vocal department, but I rebelled as much as I was able to, without getting kicked out. I was never quite sure why I was so turned off by opera. Perhaps it was the preconceived notion of vocal beauty and that it was not only required, but was not up for interpretation of any kind. Sure, opera folks will say that there is plenty of leeway in the art form, but I never found it. I only felt restricted and suffocated by what was supposed to be a beautiful form of expression.
This is why I turned to musical theater. I am so enamored with the concept that anything that is said or sung onstage is governed by dramatic elements. That gives the storyteller so much freedom to make choices that are based on clarity as opposed to right and wrong. So because of this relationship that I have with opera, right after graduation, I went buck wild and swore off classical singing altogether.....until tonight. Because my teaching philosophy is based on classical principles, I figured I needed to make sure I could actually still sing the stuff. And I was SHOCKED because it actually sounded better than it ever did during school! I have no idea how that happened, but I actually enjoyed going through my German pieces and my Faure and Bizet sets and then finally, my arias. I have always had a bit of a need to push my limits a bit, and that has DEFINITELY applied to my aria choices as well. The last one I sang tonight was Si puo, which is the prologue from the opera Pagliacci. If any of my voice teachers are reading this, they are probably going to load their shotguns. Dont worry. I AGREE. This piece is too big for me and I will probably never sing it outside of my house or a barricaded practice room. I vividly remember singing this aria at school really late one night, and after nailing, NAILING the last few pages, glancing out of the window of my practice room and seeing one of the faculty members giving me a look that made me feel like my eyelashes were going to be singed off. Welcome to my life. That was nothing compared to when they heard me belting. Oh well. In the end, if I can sing opera and also sing musical theater, that only makes me versatile, and that seems like more of an advantage than something that needs to be snuffed out. Just saying.
Maybe I wont wait another three months before I sing this stuff again. Eh. On second thought....ha!
Ciao!
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